Leaning into disappointment

As entrepreneurs, visionaries, possibility makers, we often live in the future.  Ideas and projects pulling us forward to the next opportunity, next sale, next… next. 

So what happens when we slow down and stop long enough to look around?  

When we look around and see that everything in this present moment isn’t exactly as we had envisioned?

Team members are not as skilled, available, committed as we had planned.
Clients are not as happy, successful, accountable as we had expected.
Launches are not as profitable as we had projected.
Leads are not flowing as we had counted on.
Relationships are not as stable as we thought they were.
Revenue is not as abundant as we had forecasted it would be. 

In the midst of the visioning, in the euphoria of the delivering, something shifted.

Was it us?
Was it them?
Will it shift back? Forward?

All of a sudden there is an emotion.  One that we don’t often have the luxury of leaning into: disappointment. 

I’m a problem solver, with a full belief everything is fixable… and that everything is working for us.

Yet, when these moments hit I have learned over time the art of to leaning in.

What is disappointment trying to teach me?
Where do I need to own the outcome in a different way, in a more intimate way?
What do I need to release? (Hello Law of Sacrifice!)
What do I need to open to and receive?

As driven, successful business owners it is easy to start looking for what went wrong… making ourselves wrong, making others wrong, making the numbers wrong. 

It is easy to abdicate the responsibility and look for who to blame, who to pin it on. 

But the truth is: disappointment is an educator not a punisher. 

When we lean into disappointment we have an opportunity to learn. If we take it as a calling forward, if we lean into it and claim the more it has to offer us… we always win.

I love this quote from Martin Luther King, Jr.:

There can be no deep disappointment where there is not deep love.

It is love that is the originator of disappointment. It is why we care so deeply. And it is love that will see you through its season.  

See when we lean in, we realize that what we have loved has not reached its full expression yet. Upon that realization there are decisions to be made.  

What wants to be seen, heard or understood?
What belief did we hang on to that was not a truth?
What expectation did we attach to but not commit to the outcome of?

I want to make it clear we are meant to lean in, but not ‘linger on’ in disappointment.  Once the reflection has done its masterful work on our mindsets (and hearts!) it is then time for the pivot. 

The pivot will open new doors, create new opportunities, and birth new visions. It requires not only a change in perspective, expectation, and often relationships or environments, but also TRUST.  

You must step forward and TRUST in the unknown.

Often people experience disappointment and they quit. They retreat. They make themselves wrong and they lose the confidence they need to press forward.

But not you.
Not UNSTOPPABLE you.

You and I, we were not built to quit. We were created to thrive. To conquer. To eliminate the obstacles. 

So lean in… but don’t linger on disappointment. Use it to expand rather than retreat. Trust in the gift it has to offer you.

And trust your deep and abiding love to lead you forward to the new vision and opportunities.