Tag Archives: mindset

Time Can Be On Your Side If You Allow It

By Amira Alvarez The other day, my man and I were hustling to get out the door to go have a leisurely breakfast at this super cute, quintessential French bakery that I had just discovered.I really wanted to show it to him…I really wanted to get out of the house for the housekeeper…And…
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Coaching, Mindset, Unstoppable, , ,

The other day, my man and I were hustling to get out the door to go have a leisurely breakfast at this super cute, quintessential French bakery that I had just discovered.

I really wanted to show it to him…

I really wanted to get out of the house for the housekeeper…

And really wanted to get there and back before my first meeting of the day…

But we didn’t have much time.

So I was pacing by the back door, waiting impatiently. 

When he noticed this, he graciously spoke to it saying, “I didn’t realize we were in a time crunch.” 

To which I snarkily replied, “Yes, you did!”

Ouch!

I immediately regretted it and apologized. 

But why did that come out of my mouth in the first place? 

That’s not who I am and yet that’s what I said.

And this brings us to the topic for today… Our relationship with time. 

Although it may be true that time is a non-renewable resource that we never get back… 

Have you ever noticed that sometimes you feel like things flow so smoothly, you get a ton of stuff done, and it seems like you have all the time in the world?

While other times you’re worried about time, everything takes longer than you expected, and more to-dos just pile up? (And you end up being stressed and snarky.)

Our experience of time changes based on how we are relating to it. And in turn, our experience of life changes based on how we’re relating to time. 

Sometimes we feel spacious and divine… and other times not so much.

So the next day, I tried a different tack… one that ALWAYS works better for me.

I decided what I wanted to get done but reduced dramatically the time-sensitive constraints I put on myself.

In fact, I choose to commit to only one time specific activity, giving myself much more flexibility.

The result? 

One of the best days ever, full of flow.

Now I’m not suggesting throwing out your calendar, blowing off meetings, or ignoring your task list.

But I am asking you to choose your highest priorities, commit to that, and then trust the flow of life more. 

It’s not about discarding structure but rather about infusing it with trust and adaptability. 

It’s about testing out what the least amount of time-based structure is that you need to get your work done in this world. 

It’s about being fully committed to your highest and best life, and not living a compromised, time pressured version of it.

With some practice, you’ll find yourself creating days that resonate with the essence of living exquisitely. Stack those and you’ve got an exquisite life… one that’s truly worth living.

It’s time to lean into that, yes?

———

Want to experience more as an Unstoppable Woman?

Be sure to check out the Unstoppable Woman podcast. If you’re ready to grow a life and business you love, schedule a call to discuss how we can help you step into your next level of growth.  

How I Stay Elevated: It’s a Conscious Decision

By Amira Alvarez I sit here on a quiet fall morning, on the first day back after Thanksgiving contemplating the highs and lows that we all experience. In this case, I’m not thinking about the dramatic highs and lows – the ones we feel with the big successes or the profound losses–rather, those quite…
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Coaching, Mindset, Unstoppable, ,

I sit here on a quiet fall morning, on the first day back after Thanksgiving contemplating the highs and lows that we all experience. 

In this case, I’m not thinking about the dramatic highs and lows – the ones we feel with the big successes or the profound losses–rather, those quite mundane daily ups and downs. 

The ones that have you say… What happened? Why am I in such a crappy mood? Or, I’ll take it but where did all this abundant joy and energy come from? 

You can be flying high one day, then wondering what happened the next. 

As a high-performer, you absolutely always get the work done no matter what even if you’re “in a bad mood”… but wouldn’t it be nice to understand how to get off this roller coaster? 

Although I’m still a work in progress (and I wouldn’t have it any other way), here’s how I step off the emotional roller coaster. 

First, a framework within which to understand the action you must take… 

We have an individual set-point. This is the mood, state, or level of well-being where you come back to over and over again. 

You go up a bit, then come back to your set point.

You go down a bit lower, they come up to your set point.

This set-point is your emotional norm. 

Even if this norm isn’t how you’d like to feel, you keep coming back to it.

Your norm is the known, conditioned, habituated Self. 

It’s the way of being that you’ve conditioned yourself to recognize as you.

She has the same complaints… same frustrations… same habits of thought… same perspectives… same reactions and actions… and the same conversations in her head. 

Here’s a good example…

I woke up in a GREAT mood. Then I went to get tea instead of coffee, a change I consciously decided to make yesterday…

And on my way to the kettle, I recognized a conversation in my head that was mopey and complaining. Not enough time… don’t want to do it… it’s going to take too long… and so on.

These are familiar thoughts of the old, conditioned Self. 

But here’s the thing to know… These thoughts weren’t really related to the “tea rather than coffee” decision. Not at all.

It’s that my Conditioned Self felt I was too far above my set point so it engaged in an internal conversation of conditioned thinking about the most convenient topic at hand to bring me back to “myself.”   

This moment, when you realize that you’ve been hijacked by your Conditioned Self, is your moment of TRUTH and you have a DECISION to make…

Change or stay complicit with your Conditioned Self.

And it’s so seductively easy to keep thinking those habitual thoughts and taking those habitual actions because they feel right. You’re so used to thinking them that they’ve become your emotional comfort zone. 

And yet if you want off the roller coaster, you must intentionally change your thinking. 

Which is what I did this morning. I replaced those familiar thoughts with thinking as I truly wanted to be and am: Grateful. Happy. In love with life.

The result?

A delicious cup of tea AND… a steady stream of feeling in the flow, in love with life, one with the Universe.  

This is the process I’ve been using for years to continually uplevel my personal set point and yet I’m astounded how every time I uplevel, there are new places that my conditioned self rears up. (Really? Making tea is going to set you off? Lol!)

I’m also astounded by how easy it is to stay complicit and go along with the Conditioned Self.

It’s surprising how much discipline it requires to consistently recognize the habitual patterns that bring you down to your set-point. 

Yet when you do, you free yourself from that emotional roller coaster and start living a truly exquisite life.

———

Want to experience more as an Unstoppable Woman?

Be sure to check out the Unstoppable Woman podcast. If you’re ready to grow a life and business you love, schedule a call to discuss how we can help you step into your next level of growth.  

How I Get to Live with the Man of my Dreams

By Amira Alvarez There’s a part of the manifestation process I haven’t talked about a lot. It’s the course correction part. It’s the part where you go with the flow and you don’t get stuck forcing one way over the other.Here’s how it works…You want something, whether small or large. Desire has called you. You…
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Coaching, Mindset, Unstoppable, , ,

There’s a part of the manifestation process I haven’t talked about a lot. 

It’s the course correction part. It’s the part where you go with the flow and you don’t get stuck forcing one way over the other.

Here’s how it works…

You want something, whether small or large. Desire has called you. 

You get clear on it for yourself. You name it and claim it. (Infinite Intelligence already knows, this part is for you and your alignment.)

Then you get ideas. They come to you clearly as distinct knowing, signs, magical alignments, i.e. running into the particular people, events, opportunities.

You act on them. This is the place not to overthink. Decide and act quickly when you’re moved, when you know. 

BUT then…

They don’t always work out according to what YOU had in mind.

That doesn’t mean they’re not working out. They are! 

The Universe is an ordered place. Sometimes it may seem like chaos or things not working out but that’s only from your level of awareness. There is always order… and it’s always in your favor. But you have to be open to seeing it that way

Let me give you an example…

I met a man. Not just any man. But the man I’m going to spend the rest of my life with. (This is a longer story of finally getting over a core wound of being unlovable, one that haunted me through dating, a marriage, and subsequent relationships but that’s for another time…)

As my relationship evolved, it quickly became clear that we wanted to live together. Desire calls.

Small issue… I live in North Carolina and he lives in California, where he’s happily fathering teenagers, so it’s not as easy as just shacking up.

So I set an intention. I named it and claimed it…

Daughter happy, son happy, ex happy, and James and I supremely happy, living together by the end of the year.

This intention represents my true desire. I desired a way for James and I to be supremely happy living together by the end of the year that included his kids being happy as well. That was what really mattered to me. 

The ‘how that happened’ didn’t matter to me. I was open to all the ways.

Flash forward to lots of signs (like multiple run-ins with my real estate agent) and quickly deciding to put my house up for sale and move to California. 

This was a full steam ahead kind of decision. I acted quickly and we were staged, listed, and set to show it licketedy split. 

Then it was off to CA to look at houses to buy or rent.

There were two almost right places, but neither were our ‘it’ place. Hmmm… this isn’t working out as planned?

But in the process of looking at one ‘almost it’ place in Montecito, which was a much further distance from his kids than we originally planned, James realized he was good with the idea of commuting weekly.

So he suggests, what if I move in with you and commute from North Carolina?

I say, YES! (Of course.)

Now let’s break this down…

This was clearly the order of the Universe. With the level of awareness that 20/20 hindsight provides, the order is so clear.

We needed to explore all the options, in order to get good with this one.
We needed to try to make other things work, in order to get the idea that would work.   
We needed to act and not loop on why it wasn’t working, in order to be open to the best way forward.

Move in day is coming right up…November 27th, before the end of the year. :) 

So voila… the clear intentional desire I set…

Daughter happy, son happy, ex happy, and James and I supremely happy, living together by the end of the year.

…was met after all with so much beauty, ease, and order. 

Long story short, this is how manifestation often works. You lock onto an idea for creating what you want but that may not be the easiest, most graceful and ordered way for the Universe to provide you what you want. Be open to that. Go with the flow. Don’t force the way.

———

Want to experience more as an Unstoppable Woman?

Be sure to check out the Unstoppable Woman podcast. If you’re ready to grow a life and business you love, schedule a call to discuss how we can help you step into your next level of growth.  

Success is Just the Beginning: A Real Conversation About Purpose

By Amira Alvarez Tailored for impact: Heads up! This is meant for a very specific individual – the brilliant entrepreneur or C-suite-savvy woman. If that's you, keep reading.  You know how to build a business. You’ve done it. Perhaps even multiple times. That’s not where the challenge lies. The challenge lies when you…
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Coaching, Mindset, Unstoppable, , ,

Tailored for impact:

Heads up! This is meant for a very specific individual – the brilliant entrepreneur or C-suite-savvy woman. If that’s you, keep reading. 

You know how to build a business. You’ve done it.

Perhaps even multiple times.

That’s not where the challenge lies.

The challenge lies when you look beyond what you’ve accomplished and ask yourself what’s next? 

Do I start another business? Step into another role in another company?
Does that even light me up? What do I really want to do?

You more or less have the time and the money to do what you want.

And you’re certainly not short of ideas. 

You keep cycling through what you could do with your life and you’re frustrated by why it’s not clear.

You land on an idea, one that would serve the world and you could probably do that very successfully, BUT…

Something’s not lighting you up about any of it… and you can’t put your finger on it. 

Is it worth the effort? Can I rally my energy for that? Do I even want to?

And here’s the thing…

You don’t really want to work like that any more. You don’t want to keep chasing the goal, being driven by urgency, stress, and not letting others down. 

You know that intuitively.

And yet… you ask… how do I motivate myself if not by the urgency created by setting another big ass goal?

Well, you can’t do it within the same paradigm.
It’s by approaching it in a totally different way.

It starts with…

Getting at the truth of who you are.
Understanding what you truly want. All of it.
Recognizing your purpose.
Figuring out what to do with that.
Unraveling the reasons why it can’t work, so that it does work.
Then walking the uncharted path and having a lived experience of a life that actually lights you up.

If this appeals to you, I’m taking two clients right now on this journey. Is one of them you?

This is for those who want to create their most exquisite life…
Who want to make good on the unconscious promises of how their life would be that they made to themselves in childhood…
Who do not wish to tolerate a compromised life any longer…
Who are willing to be present to what needs to unfold and do the deep work…

To see if this work is right for you, and if you and I are a good fit to work together, email us that you’re interested.

My team will have a 15 minute alignment conversation with you. If we think it’s a good fit, they’ll set up a time for you and I to have an in-depth conversation.

May your spirit guide you to what’s right for you.

Order, Beauty, and Success: Lessons from David Beckham

By Amira Alvarez Last night I wrapped up the Netflix documentary on David Beckham. It was soooo good!  I love learning about successful people’s paths and although there’s so much to muse about in this documentary, I want to focus on Beckham’s seeming obsession with order in his environment… from the meticulous way…
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Coaching, Mindset, Unstoppable, , , , , ,

Last night I wrapped up the Netflix documentary on David Beckham. It was soooo good! 

I love learning about successful people’s paths and although there’s so much to muse about in this documentary, I want to focus on Beckham’s seeming obsession with order in his environment… from the meticulous way he keeps his kitchen to the order of his clothes in his closet.

One might say it’s slightly OCD or that he has too much time on his hands, but I imagine that this level of order creates so much visual beauty that it helps quiet his mind. 

I know that seeing how he folded, stacked, and arranged his t-shirts made my heart smile and calmed my nervous system right down. Ahhhhh…

As someone who loves a clean and ordered house… who organizes her closet by both type of clothing and color… who likes her shoes all facing the same way… you get the idea…it’s peaceful and easy on my eyes… I totally relate.   

Order creates so much beauty and beauty is a type of order.

But watching someone err on the side of compulsion made me muse…

Is there such a thing as too much order? 

And further… I wonder what the closets of the über successful are like???

I can’t imagine anyone who is truly on the top of their game having a disordered environment.

So does order create success or are the successful naturally ordered? 

Clearly, an OCD compulsion for order alone doesn’t create success. But a disordered environment and disordered thinking certainly creates friction that gets in the way of success in both life and business.

So what’s the lesson from Beckham’s meticulousness?

No, it’s not to be OCD about everything in life. 

The lesson is to find the order that creates beauty and flow in your life and build on that. Not so much that it constrains your flow but enough to give structure to it.

Order in your relationships, management, parenting, time, food, health, love… and yes, your closet. ;-) 

Create that order and watch your peace, ease, and success increase.

Want to experience more as an Unstoppable Woman?

Be sure to check out the Unstoppable Women podcast. If you’re ready to grow a life and business you love, schedule a call to discuss how we can help you step into your next level of growth.  

The cocktail of business and emotions

By Amira Alvarez Sometimes our feelings are overwhelming. They come on strong and knock you to your knees. From clients to friends, this week I saw such bright, formidable women in tears. These are women running exceptional businesses–they are strong, ambitious, juggling all the things. And yet when the feelings come, they can’t…
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Business, Coaching, Inspiration, Mindset, Unstoppable, , , ,

Sometimes our feelings are overwhelming. They come on strong and knock you to your knees.

From clients to friends, this week I saw such bright, formidable women in tears.

These are women running exceptional businesses–they are strong, ambitious, juggling all the things.

And yet when the feelings come, they can’t be suppressed… even if that would be much more convenient.

Sure, we can set them aside or compartmentalize for a period.

I know I have. 

And yet if you don’t attend to them, that’s when all hell breaks loose. 

Rash decisions, meltdowns, losing your temper.

Or the inability to make decisions, a ‘what’s the point’ attitude, or full-blown depression.

It can get ugly. It can be a spiral of negativity.

Because your feelings will have their say, one way or another. 

They will absolutely do whatever is necessary to get your attention.

Because they need your attention. There is something important that they have for you.

Think about it… why would we have feelings if they didn’t serve an important purpose?

Nothing is random. We don’t live in a random universe. 

So despite them coming up at inconvenient times, they are not the enemy.

So how do you deal with your feelings when you’re running a major business and it’s just not the time for a major meltdown?

That’s a really good question. Today I’d like to share ONE of the things I do. 

It’s a process that once you get good at, takes all of 2 minutes. Sometimes it’s even shorter than that.

I taught it to the women in the Spirit of Wealth this past week, taking them through an in real time, actual lived experience of using this. 

I love these moments because theoretical book-learning only takes us so far. We actually learn on the field of play. That’s where it gets deeply embedded and rewired for us.

Here’s a brief recap of what I shared with them…

If you’re all good right now, listen anyway. You’ll have it for when you need it.

If there’s a feeling that’s pulling at you, needing attention, please use this process now. Maybe a few times. 

It’s a practice that starts now.